Faye Ray

This is the story of Velda Faye Southern Ramsey Ray.

            I was born in Pryor, Oklahoma on May 8, 1946 to a dirt farmer and his wife. This

was a Wednesday. My Dad said that I was almost born on the 9th. The poem says

Wednesday's child is full of woe. Whatever that means! I never felt like I was woeful.

Anyway, on with my life.

            My Mother, Hazel, came from a family of 5 children. Her Mother was left a

widow at an early age, with 5 children to raise on her own. The baby, I think was only 2.

There was 3 girls and 2 boys. My Mom was the middle child. She always felt she was

alone. The others all had a sibling close to their age.

            My Dad Omer, didn't talk too much about his growing up years. He also had 5

children in his family. There were 3 boys and 2 girls. The family was very poor. His

Mom divorced and remarried, as did his Dad. So, my concept of his family was

confusing to me and far different than my Moms.

            As a young child, on one hand I had my Mom's family...gathered often...visited

and laughed often. On the other hand..my Dad's family was not so connected. They very

seldom got together. I don't ever remember any holidays we met as a family. That family

was not into loving and caring as my Mom's family was. I shall be forever grateful for

the attention and love that my Mom's family had for each other and showed me.

            Now, about my name...my long name. I was known as Velda Faye Southern until I

entered the 7th grade. I think that was called junior high back in the day. When I went

back to school after summer vacation, I insisted on being Faye Southern. My Dad was

okay with this change, but Mom..not so much. I never liked Velda. In fact, I think I was

named after my Dad's best friends daughter. How weird is that?

            As was the way in the little town of Pryor, Oklahoma, I graduated from high

school, went to college (for awhile) and got married. That exercise changed my name, or

at least added to my name...Ramsey. That name was good for about 37 years. But, things

change and I did too. I legally changed my last name to Ray. This was my maternal

grandmothers maiden name and I wanted to honor her. She was one person that I

knew...without a shadow of a doubt...she loved, loved, loved me. So now, I am known as

Faye Ray. I like that name. It's short. Easy to say and for most people, easy to spell. My

daughter will have to decide how many of those names to put on my stone.

            When my life changed, also my last name, I went back to college. Got my

associate degree and my bachelor degree, worked 3 jobs and took care of my Mother.

After my Dad died, she was found to have Alzheimer's. This was a very stressful time for

me and Angela as well. I look back now, and think I must have had the Lord giving me

strength. Because, now just the thought of all that makes me tired.

            After graduation, I went to work as as insurance agent. Now, I knew nothing about

selling insurance and often wondered why I was in that office. I was the new kid. The

guys in that office were patient and mostly kind. It wasn't perfect, but it sure was

interesting. Those guys are all spread out to other interests now, but I have kept in touch

and grown close to one. Zane and I live in the same neighborhood. So it is easy to visit. I

am grateful for all he has done for me during this time. The job lasted 10 yrs, but the

friendship will go on forever.

            There were other times, I had to wonder what was I doing here??? One of those was

when I became a Mother. Oh brother. Talk about not having a clue. I am an only child.

Only baby sitting job I ever had, my mother had to leave her job and rescue me!!! When

Angela would cry, I would hold her up to my face and ask her what was wrong. I sure

had no clue. She turned out great. I guess I did something right. But then...again... her

GeeMaw probably had more to do with that than me. With her prayers and obvious love

for my child...she made the difference.

            I had lots of titles thru my live...daughter, student, wife, mother, insurance agent, best

friend, divorced widow, and cancer patient. That last one got to me. Brought me down.

Cancer is so hard to accept. So hard. As I write this, its June 20, 2020. I don't know if I

am a survivor, or a statistic. I have tried to accept and deal with the cards I have been

dealt in my life. But, we all must go and that is all right with me. The Lord has been

with me. Held me when I couldn't walk. And now He is there waiting. For this, I am

grateful.

            In my life, I have met some terrific people. And some not so. I have been hurt by

people that I truly loved and thought they loved me. But after a time, that just was not the

truth. I have had some trials...who hasn't? But some successes too. I don't want this day

to be terribly sad. I do want each of you to celebrate my life. Laugh at some of the funny

things you remember and go away with a feeling of peace.